Hey, bastard, I got the upper hand again.
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I had put off my class for Monday and Tuesday. I was afraid I had to do it again this evening, given the fact that I felt sore and weak and sluggish and was still on medication. Besides, I knew any mental exertion would almost certainly ruin my sleep. During the past two days when I was in the thick of my sickness, intermittently feverish and constantly busted, in order to kill my time, I watched two English movies with Chinese subtitles on the line. Consequently, I ended up keeping working on some damned English lines in my dream until I woke up around two o’clock early in the morning.
Each time I dialed any of the numbers my pupils gave me to notify them that that evening’s class was called off, it was usually their parents, rather than them, that answered on the other end of the line. The parents’ responses varied. Some of them were understanding and thankful for my thoughtful call, whereas some others were a bit impatient and unsatisfied. So, this time around, I decided to dispatch the message to my pupils in person, though it would entail a trip to the classroom. The other reason was that I believed a face-to-face explanation would always appear more credible and convincing than one made on the phone. Apparently, an entertaining and rewarding job had turned into a sapsucker for me.
Before I walked out of my door, I suddenly doubted if I could make it there. I had been confined to my apartment for nearly three days. Would I still be strong enough to withstand the round trip? I felt ashamed at this ridiculous idea that a seven minutes’ walk would have turned out a daunting task for me.
Only took a dozen steps into the path did I realize what a toll my sickness had taken on my body. I walked much slower than usual, and in a less assured gait. Soon I began to sweat. It was so humiliating to shuffle at an old man’s pace on the street.
Thanks to three days’ solitary life, everything felt stingingly fresh to my sense. People were going about their lives as usual. Construction workers were laying tiles on the sidewalk. Trees were dug out of their rectangular sockets on the sidewalk, laying across and blocking my way. I was reminded of the old saying that each human being was only a passer-by in this world. And indeed I was just going past what was happening around in the form of a passer-by. If I succumbed to the fever, for no reason I was caught by this whimsical idea, no matter insane and morbid it might look, everything would have been the same way as they were now.
I was so preoccupied with how to endure the unbearable fever and alleviate the symptoms that nothing else was of my concern any more. As if to recoup my suffering, my mind and soul had shed truckloads of earthly thoughts and desires, at least for the moment. I had an unprecedented sense of relief and purity. I relished so much this by-product of my throes with the disease.
In the last 72 hours, I pit my strength against the devastating power of bacteria that had got through the baptism of anti-bacteria, probably having been enhanced by mutation and natural selection. The most formidable part of it was the recurrent fever. In one of such attacks, all I could do was lie in bed and endure until it faded away, having only my body’s immune system as the last line of defense. Yes, I knew that were it not for my well-functioning immune system, the heat spike wouldn’t have gone away on its own. That was why I only took a dose of intravenous drip to stave off a sturdy wave of heat attack, and then I weaned myself off anti-bacteria and resolved to put my body to the acid test of fighting off the fever. After a number of inconclusive battles, my body emerged triumphant yesterday morning – no fever attack all night. And it was gone forever.
If someone thought I was a lazy guy who never did exercise and had a frail constitution, he was totally wrong. Before my office moved house last month, I used to take a big detour on my way to work so as to get enough exercise before sitting out a working day. Besides, I managed to fix up an hour or so walk in my schedule every day. I knew an ounce’s exercise in health beats a pound’s medication in sickness. Before I fell down with fever, every morning I cycled for an hour to and from the beach. My confidence in my stamina and strength was so much boosted that I began to seriously plan on cycling all the way to my grandpa’s place some day in the near future – a town more than 60 km away from my city. Now my hope, even expectation, was dashed. I had to start all over from scratch.
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